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Prior to the launch of the new Code of Conduct, there used to be fewer flag reasons available for comments. Like -- "No longer needed", "Rude or Abusive" etc.

Now, there is a new reason called:

"It's unfriendly or unkind"

Which kinds of comments exactly are to be flagged using this as the reason?
In other words, what kind of comment other users should make to let it be flagged with this?

I'm asking because it's pretty close to "Rude and Abusive" and also because the definition is somewhat vague.

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    This should be asked in the main meta. As per Updated comment flagging - Supporting the new Code of Conduct, some people too feel that 2 flags related to "Code of conduct" appear similar.
    – iammilind
    Commented Aug 17, 2018 at 7:15
  • You can just delete here and repost it there. Because migrating has a loophole which favours you. If migrated, the post goes with same 4 upvotes and I can vote there too. That is not a fair thing and gaming the system. If you feel fair delete and repost it there. I think this is already asked there.
    – Sarvabhouma
    Commented Aug 17, 2018 at 9:17
  • That is already explained by giving four examples in tubular in the page. Do you want to learn/know further explanation with examples?
    – Pandya Mod
    Commented Aug 19, 2018 at 5:25
  • Yes it is confusing right now to me.. the more examples the better.. @Pandya
    – Rickross
    Commented Aug 19, 2018 at 5:39

1 Answer 1

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The explanation is already given in the page:

No subtle put-downs or unfriendly language.
Even if you don’t intend it, this can have a negative impact on others.

Some examples are also given in tabular form:

enter image description here

See here both messages on left side and right side are illustration same things being said with different tone.

There are three styles of communication. (Let's take one example of communication between A and B). I'm not expert in such topics related to communication skill, however I think it may be useful and related to write here.

  1. Aggressive
    A express his thoughts with hostile tone and tries to impose B's statement are false and thinking I (A) am only saying true. This is also called winning condition (I win, you lose). A doens't care about feelings or rights of B.

  2. Passive
    A express his inner thoughts in passive (indirect) way thinking himself powerless or resentful. Considering B superior to him. (I lose, you win).

  3. Assertive
    A is conveying his thoughts without hurting feelings of B and also not thinking B is superior to him) This is the healthy communication born of high-esteem. (I win, you win)

For healthy and constructive communication, assertive style of communication is recommended. You can learn the difference between these style with examples of behavioral characteristics, language etc. from this article.

I think StackExchange recommend to use the tone/language that is of assertive style, clear, open, constructive, honest and doesn't impact negative effect on others -- that can be called friendly.

It may be the case that although we are not intentionally demeaning or criticizing the post or poster, the choice of improper language may negatively impact like we're talking so i.e demeaning or criticizing. So, in order to avoid such misunderstanding or misconception, Friendly language is to be followed and Unfriendly tone should be avoided. This is very useful especially while communicating with new users. With the similar idea New Contributor Indicator is recently implemented.

So, if you find that unfriendly (criticizing, negative, hostile or aggressive) language in comments, you can flag appropriately.

I'll add some examples if needed.

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  • I have already seen those examples but still it is not clear to me. Is it clear to you how to handle flags when some uses that as the reason?
    – Rickross
    Commented Aug 20, 2018 at 14:16

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